Psychological Reactance…You Don’t Need to Listen To This Episode, Actually I Wouldn’t If I Were You!

Simply put, psychological reactance is the instantaneous response that we have when we’re told what to do. In business it is often called “change resistance” and in parenting, it’s typically referred to as, well, “kids!” Reactance can also be described as “reverse psychology.” But why does it flow from us so instantaneously? Why, in some situations, can someone even be telling us something that would ultimately be for our benefit but we feel a need to lash out with a firm “no, you don’t understand, that won’t work for me?” And per Tony’s early admonition on this episode, you can skip to 9 mins 10 seconds in to skip directly to the discussion on reactance.

Today Tony tackles the topic of psychological reactance and bases the discussion on a couple of interesting articles on the subject. First is an article titled simply “Reactance” from and “Don’t Tread On Me! Psychological Reactance as Omnipresent” by Ryan Smerek Ph.D.

Tony mentioned two recent podcast appearances in the beginning of the episode, you can find his episode “Tony Overbay, Virtual Couch Podcast and Porn Addiction” on Nikki Eisenhauer’s Emotional Badass here and Tony’s interview on Brannon Patrick’s new podcast “Ask Brannon Anything” titled “Faith Crisis & Relationships” here

Tony’s new best selling book “He’s a Porn Addict…Now What? An Expert and a Former Addict Answer Your Questions” is now available on Kindle.

Tony Overbay, is the co-author of “He’s a Porn Addict…Now What? An Expert and a Former Addict Answer Your Questions” now available on Amazon The book debuted in the number 1 spot in the Sexual Health Recovery category and remains there as the time of this record. The book has received numerous positive reviews from professionals in the mental health and recovery fields.

The book tackles tough questions with answers from both the expert and the addict’s point of view. Tony, a licensed marriage and family therapist, and creator of The Path Back, an online pornography addiction recovery program that has helped hundreds of people overcome turning to pornography and other compulsive sexual behaviors as a coping mechanism, and Joshua Shea, former addict, and author of the book “The Addiction Nobody Will Talk About” read their respective answers to questions such as “Finding out he’s addicted to porn has turned me off to sex completely, what should I do?” And “How much do we tell the kids?” And “Does this mean that God is mad at me, or doesn’t love me?”

Reviews include: “This is the most helpful book for porn addicts and the people who (still) love them. One of the most courageous and timely books to help with a widespread and almost never talked about epidemic that is ruining marriages, careers, and lives. It will give hope to millions of people who are addicted to pornography. — Mark Goulston, MD, FAPA, Author of Just Listen Discover the Secret to Getting Through to Absolutely Anyone.

You can learn more about Tony’s pornography recovery program The Path Back by visiting And visit and sign up to receive updates on upcoming programs, and podcasts.

The Virtual Couch is sponsored by is the world’s leading provider of online therapy. Their mission is to make professional counseling accessible, affordable, and convenient, so anyone who struggles with life’s challenges can get help, anytime, anywhere. Head to for 10% off your first month of services.

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